Next to Albums, Books, Films and so on I’m starting a playthrough-review-list of the “1001 Video Games you must play before you die”. They’ll be reviewed by my random modern standards of a guy who didn’t have a console until circa 2005, so I don’t care about nostalgia factors as much as I care about how much time I could or did sink into them. The only rule is the obvious one, I have to try the game for at least 10-15 minutes. Let’s get the memories rolling and the Retroid console started and jump right into it. Before doing larger review, I’ll knock down 20 classics in a row.

#1 – Asteroids

Minimal graphics from the late ’70s. I haven’t played this in the arcade but I have put some time into it when I was a kid. I was buying CDs filled with games for the equivalent of about two bucks a pop. Since decent internet didn’t come about yet I was trying out anything I could. Good game. 7/10 meteors

#2 – Space Invaders

Oh boy, this one is a proper classic that got remade in dozens of ways. I’ve played the Chicken version a lot in my time. The gameplay is timeless and aged incredibly well. I’m always down for an Invaders round, so 10/10 invaders.
(Galaxian is also on the list, it’s the same idea so 8/10)

#3 – The Oregon Trail

Killer gameplay, in the sense that you would die every time you played this. I’ve never made it to the other side. 6/10 dysentery deaths.

#4 – Lunar Lander

Played the PC version, absolutely tough game but fair once you got the hang of it. No notes, 8/10 landings.

#5 – Pong

I know, it’s like the first video game ever made. But unlike others on this list I don’t think I could ever hear someone say “hey, I brought the Atari, let’s play some Pong”. 5/10 pongs, this one doesn’t get a free pass just because good tennis video games came about 30 years later.

#6 – Breakout

You’ve probably played a version of this ball-vs-blocks game every five years on a different platform each time. I know I did. First console, then PC, later Nokia, smartphones… Intuitive and satisfying. 8/10 blocks.

#7 – Tetris

This pleases the ADHD brain. In my case at lower speeds to actually enjoy it. But it’s fantastic. No way out of this one, 10/10 line blocks.

#8 – Pac-Man

A metaphor for… something, this rather endless and pointless game gets only 4/10 cherries from me.

#9 – Donkey-Kong

I know it was a pretext for the game, but a gorilla throwing barrels at a proto-Mario whose girlfriend was a tramp… There just wasn’t any appeal to me whatsoever. Let’s give this a 2/10 and move on.

#10 – Frogger

This is one that also has a stupid pretext, but there’s at least some strategy and skill needed to play it. Another one that I loved in chicken form as well. 9/10 logs crossed.

#11 – Missile Command

Another game I found randomly on a CD and sank a few hours in as a kid. Great concept, simple and increasingly challenging gameplay. 8/10 missiles.

#12 – The Legend of Zelda

Played this on the Retroid quite recently. Or I tried to play it, because I tossed it quite soon after. If I was a kid who had a whole summer holiday open and the patience and stupidity to play the same god damn thing again and again and not mind a frustrating experience I would have liked it. 3/10 sorries, not sorry.

#13 – Bomberman

This is it. This is the first one where I must have played every goddamn variation that exists. So many days spent in Atomic Bomberman in multiplayer. Or the silly double-single-player where one moved and the other placed the bombs. Still play a few on the Retroid today. 10/10 bombs.

#14 – Dr. Mario

Send help, this is my go to for waiting rooms or train rides. Slide the game to level 15 and pop the pills. Why are the viruses so cranky? Where did Mario get his degree? Who gives a toss. 9/10 pills.

#15 – Lemmings

This is a philosophical game. You play it for a while and start to be mindful of your surroundings and think to yourself: what has brought me to this point in life that I’m playing Lemmings instead of something good? 1/10 falls off the edge.

#16 – Maniac Mansion

One of the first point-and-click games, a funny non-linear adventure. It’s good. Fine, really. The sequel, Day of the Tentacle, is much better. 7/10 maniacs.

#17 – Super Mario Bros

Let’s get this out of the way and not talk about it too much. I don’t get why people go mad over this character. It’s a plumber with a mustache and a taller brother. Ok, I’m being a jerk, the game’s actually fun. 7/10 koopas.

#18 – Minesweeper

Played this as a kid, only a few years ago did I figure out how it should actually be played. I thought it was half-luck, but it’s not. I now play it during some work meetings on Google. 7/10 bombs.

#19 – Castlevania

Tried the whole lot of Castlevania games and hated each of them equally. The whip has got to be the worst weapon in a video game. It’s a tool that should be used for horses and BDSM. That’s it. Sorry, Indiana Jones, I’m not really buying your shtick either.
3/10 vampires.

#20 – Sonic the Hedgehog

Ending things on a good note because I found this one actually fun. Does it makes sense for hedgehogs to move that fast? No. But I haven’t seen what a wild hedgehog can do with golden rings so it’s not “Myth Busted” for this yet. 7/10

Alright, that’s the bucket list started. I’ve got my Retroid packed with ROMs and I’ll probably get a VM going on my PC as well to test out some Windows 98 games.